CalExpeditions

Tag: California

  • Desert Tripping

    Desert Tripping

    Journeyed back to the American Southwest, via San Luis Obispo and Palm Springs. I’ve mapped out dispersed, aka wild, camp sites to break the longer legs into shorter ones. I’m in no hurry, so why drive long hours when I can stop and stay in the comfort of my own mobile house?

    Visited Truth or Consequences, New Mexico. Yup, that’s a real place. Named after a radio show from days gone by. It used to be called Hot Springs. Throngs of celebrities converged on the town in the 1950’s annually, to host the radio show.
    The natural hot springs here have the highest mineral content of any water anywhere! I suppose that means it is hard water, but it sounds better the first way. I soaked in an excellent private pool and was restored to the radiant vitality of my youth.
    I camped here on the the bed of a used-to-be lake, called Elephant Butte (EL a FONT boo TAY) Lake. While there, I mounted an archeological expedition to identify significant artifacts from the past.

     

    Xena, the Warrior Archeologist, assisted with my efforts. I was too busy with my scientific endeavors to take an actual photo, so I had MidJourney, the artificial intelligence artist, re-create the scene.
    Archeology is a very easy field, requiring little more than strolling across the terrain. My first discovery was this dinosaur toenail, embedded in the dry lake bed.
    Before positively identifying the object, I considered the only alternative: a doorway to an inter-dimensional portal. One of the privileges afforded me as a Master of Science is the freedom to test hypotheses without supervision. This I did, aided by a locally-procured wooden probe. Alas! Nothing but dirt under it. At least my first theory was proven correct: dinosaur toenail. I believe it is the first ever recovered.
    I also discovered this object of unknown origin. Speculating from the fine workmanship and exotic materials, it appears to be of extra-terrestrial origin. I sent the coordinates to the ET Liaison Office in Roswell, in case its owner can be contacted.
    I visited the Geronimo Museum, which has little to do with Geronimo, but much about the fine dresses women wore. This, of course, was in the days of gender inequality, when women got all of the niceties and men were required to wear drab clothing.
    Here’s a close up of the fine workmanship of these dresses. Having little else to do, pioneer women made fabulous clothes.
    This is an example of the type of chair the cow farmers would strap to unwitting horses. They used the thin strips of leather you see hanging from the front of the chair to coerce the horse into obedience.
    The Desert Southwest is a sporty place, so I engaged the locals in the manly art of bean bag tossing. I bested him, leaving him in a state of consternation.

     

  • The Living Desert, Palm Springs

    The Living Desert, Palm Springs

    The Living Desert is an excellent zoo and botanical garden near Palm Springs. They specialize in numerous varieties of cows. They also have an enormous miniature train traveling through a number of faux mountain tunnels and across ravines on detailed little bridges. I was so awestruck by the wonder that I failed to take pictures.

    These are Australia’s laziest animals, the wallowbees, so named because they spend their days wallowing in the dirt. So lazy are they that they’ve developed skin pouches to house their young to avoid carrying them!
    This rare type of tiny cow has short little prong-like horns! Bizarre!
    Genetic engineers at The Living Desert created this white cow to avoid over-heating in the desert sun. They developed the long, straight horns to serve as spear-fishing implements. Post mortem, of course.
    Stripedy cows consent only to have their butts photographed, a fetish common to their kind.
    This hideous cow has been extensively modified to produce a great hump (not shown in the photo) on its back. The hump is comprised entirely of filet mignon. Wagyu-grade. Yum yum!
    One final example of an odd cow produced at The Living Desert. This one is not genetically engineered. Instead, engineers stretch an ordinary calf on a rack until its neck is elongated, a practiced denounced as unnecessary by animal rights advocates.
    No one expected that a cross between a dog and a cat would result in such beauty. They call it a “cheetah,” ostensibly due to its refusal to follow the rules.
    I had hoped to see the wolves, but they were on holiday, visiting relatives in Mexico. The Living Desert substituted German shepherds in their absence.
  • Ancient Bristlecone Pine Forest

    Ancient Bristlecone Pine Forest

    The White Mountains, just east of the Sierras, is home of the oldest living organisms on Earth: the Ancient Bristlecone Pines. It is humbling to be in the presence of these trees; some of these trees have been growing on these mountaintops while the pyramids were built, during the rise and fall of the Roman Empire and all the rest of recorded history. You may have read about them in a recent NY Times article.

    From the top of the White Mountains, you can see for miles and miles.
    This is a bristlecone pine. In a post from a few months ago, I may have misidentified an imposter ordinary pine as a bristlecone. Sorry about that; I never claimed to be a herbologist.
    So now you know the secrets of old age: live a life under difficult conditions. Hard work = long life. I suspect many of you should get your affairs in order.
    This young man flagged me down; his tire was flat, his hydraulic jack balky. Being the helpful sort, I assisted. By “assisted,” I mean I loaned him my jack and made a cup of coffee while he changed the tire. There are advantages to driving around in your house. He is originally from Idaho, making him an Idahoan (pronounced EYE da whaan). The imperialists named it Idaho after the famous potatoes found there.

     

  • Death Valley Revisited

    Death Valley Revisited

    I realize that the last trip just kind of faded away. That’s what happens when the temperature soars and the crowds gather. I fled both nuisances and sought refuge in the cool, clement clime of the California Pacific Coast.

    Now, however, is the perfect time for a road trip. Temps are still moderate, crowds largely evaporated, and diesel prices plummeting to record lows. So I decided to take the long way back to Las Cruces, New Mexico, stopping at several of my favorite places.

    Author posing next to his camper van.
    I spent a night bivouacking (<= thank goodness for autocorrect, just this once) near Red Rock Canyon State Park. It’s east of California City, quiet, desolate, just fine for a 1-night stay.
    Rough, rocket dirt road into Death Valley.
    A rough and rugged road into Death Valley, courtesy of a huge rain storm. They got a decade of rain in a day. I would have suggested spreading it out a bit, but I’m no meteorologist.
    Lounging in the desert with a black cat.
    O! Sweet reward after surviving the perils of the road. Lounging in the garden spot of Death Valley.
    Desert oasis, complete with palm trees and soaking tubs fed by natural hot springs.
    Just kidding, here is the actual garden spot. Shiftless hippies created this space over the course of a few decades. Lawn, palm trees and soaking tubs fed by natural hot springs. Added bonus, this is the entrance to a low-level training route for naval aviators. They make frequent appearances in their loud and fast planes, just a couple hundred feet above the ground.

  • See Forever from the Pines

    Driving east through the far-east of California, I made an amazing discovery! As you probably know, Hwy 168 skirts the northern boundary of Death Valley. What I doubt you realized as you passed by, however, is the existence of some of the oldest living things on the planet. I call them “bristlecone pines.”

    This is one of many specimens of the bristlecone pines. They’ve lived in this dry, high-altitude locale for thousands of years.
    The pines have stunning views of a basin enclosed on all sides by mountains. What little rain falls here remains, with no route to the sea. Sad.
    These delicate flowers want only to bring beauty to a harsh and unforgiving world. Just like me.
    Here are the seed carriers of the bristlecone pine.

  • California is big!

    “The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.” According to Lao Tzu in the Tao Te Ching, anyway. My journey will be considerably more than a thousand miles and involves more sitting than stepping, but I guess the sentiment still applies. I left Oakland Sunday, May 15, if memory serves. It usually doesn’t, so if one of you know better, please let me know.

    I didn’t drive far on the first day. Why should I? Travel without agenda or obligations is an exercise in freedom. 😇 

    I found a nice dispersed camp site in the Stanislaus National Forest. So you can place it on your mental map, it was just south of Long Barn and north of Mi-Wuk along Hwy 108. Nothing really special, but it was a couple of miles off pavement and, once the shooting stopped, very quiet.
    Not everything has burned…the Sierras remain beautiful.
    The engineers who designed Hwy 108 must have gone to the Salvador Dali Civil Engineering School. The road is just slung across the mountains, drooping and swooping. So much turning! First I would spin the steering wheel all the way to the left, then the right, only to turn it left again! Really inefficient.
    Wow! Looks like I picked a bad time for a road trip. Spoiler alert: Prices dropped $2/gallon as soon as I crossed into Nevada.
    My camp site near Bishop, CA. Xena, the Warrior Princess, liked exploring the rocks; she did not heed my warnings about scorpions. Luckily, she didn’t find any.

    Stay tuned, next time more California and my exciting discovery!

  • California and Arizona Deserts

    I’ve been traveling through the deserts of the Southwest, testing out my van/house. Stayed at Giant Rock, but saw no extra-terrestrials. I did hear the Marine conducting live fire exercises at the nearby 29 Palms Marine Corps Base. The sound of artillery travels far in the desert. Xena the cat loved climbing all over the huge pile of boulders…on her leash, of course.

    Traveled just a few miles further east to Heart of the Mojave preserve. So nice and quiet. Vistas, but no people, for miles. Not so good for cats, though, little to see and nothing to climb on.

    Further south, I found the Cabeza Prieta Wildlife Preserve, near the (unfortunately but appropriately named) town of Ajo, Arizona, and spent another peaceful night far from civilization.

  • Manzanar, American Concentration Camps

    Manzanar is the internment camp in bleak, desolate Owens Valley, California, that housed Americans of Japanese ancestry during War World II. The site is now a National Historic Site, but there’s not much left to see. Survivors received $20,000 from the Federal Government in reparations. The curious can read more about it: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Manzanar

    Sign at the front gate of the Manzanar Ware Relocation Center.

  • An Archeologist’s Dream

    An Archeologist’s Dream

    Acting on a tip from intrepid explorers Jack and Tres, I have located a mother lode of fossil artifacts. According to legend, a tornado spawned by the Great Blow of 2015 vacuumed up several feet of the desert surface, uncovering magnificently preserved fossils from the distant past. This vast trove will keep fossilologists gainfully employed for a period of time. Read more.

    A large steel sculpture of a scorpion behind a white pickup truck of the same size.
    Fossil of a prehistoric scorpion of Tacoma size.

    Steel sculpture of a man tending a grapevine.
    One of our early ancestors engaged in hunter/gatherer behavior. Death caught him in mid-task, suggesting that an immediate catastrophe struck without warning.

    Massive steel sculpture of a prehistoric camel and her suckling young.
    In prehistoric times, offspring would gain nourishment by forcefully taking glandular secretions from its parent, rather than foraging for its own food.

  • The Mojave Transit

    The first leg of the Grand Adventure involved a transit of the Mojave (pronounced Moe Ha Veh, accent on the middle) Desert. After departing the Oakland Bay Area and overnighting in Bakersfield, I entered the inhospitable domain of the desert, which, to the surprise of many, was neither hot nor dry! The temps were bitterly cold, dipping as low as 40F degrees! The rainfall became so severe that windshield wiper use was necessary. Conditions extremified as I passed through Yucca Valley; the rain turned to slushy rain and actual snow flakes. Rapidly devolving into a an epic man-versus-nature contest, the situation required application of all available technology and native driving skill. Ha! Man wins!

    Relaxing in the jot tub.

    So far, road tripping as a way of life is agreeable